Being in film school makes you feel like you’ve aged 50 years in the span of two. Don’t get me wrong. It’s not a bad thing.
I grew up in India, a country with brilliant minds and bold hearts. A country where your average young person is capable – and driven – enough to be exactly what they want to be, and be successful at it. But for the young Indian, being successful isn’t even the difficult part. The difficult part is self-knowledge. Knowing what you want to do. Finding the power to know, in a country where your future is determined as soon as you’re born: doctor, lawyer, engineer, business executive.
When I applied to college, I applied as a journalism major. Far enough from the Indian career mold to be creative, but not so far that I can’t bank on the degree to get me a job when I graduate. The perfect balance.
But coming to college changed everything.
The idea of getting involved with filmmaking emerged from the experience of moving to the United States. I was in a new city, a new country, a new world. I was given a chance to rewrite my story, make new memories and, most importantly, get to know the person I would become. Suddenly, I was exposed to people from all over the world – my roommate was Korean, my best friend was Mexican, my study partner was half-Polish. Being surrounded by interesting people and interesting stories makes you fall into storytelling, even if you didn’t set out to do it.
I’d always been interested in film, but it had never occurred to me that it was something I could do forever. There was something so exhilarating about the concept of creating something from nothing: of engaging in a craft founded in emotion and unpredictability; an outlier in the textbook-and-problem-set world of conventional knowledge.
Think about the great directors of the world, for example. Alfred Hitchcock, Quentin Tarantino, Stanley Kubrick, Martin Scorsese (to name a few.)
Now try separating film from filmmaker. You can’t.
Every storyteller is unique. They vary in so many ways, but are great storytellers nonetheless. There are no formulas and numbers involved in storytelling. No right answers. No wrong answers. Just instinct and imagination.
Terrifying, isn’t it? Having no rules? I can’t say it isn’t.
But I wouldn’t be able to call my life a full life without stories. My life has been characterized by change. I’ve lived in Mumbai, Boston, Paris and London – I’ve been challenged, pushed out of my comfort zone and made to build up from scratch. By being exposed to stories and the storytellers that tell them, I’ve grown beyond the 20 years I’ve spent on this planet, because none of the places I lived in ever came with rules. But they came with faces, places and stories that are such an important part of my life. And that’s why I could never be a doctor, lawyer, engineer or business person.
It might be human nature to fear the unknown, but it’s a filmmaker’s instinct to embrace it.
Is it terrifying? Yes. Is it worth it? Absolutely.
